Chapter 16 | The First Taste

[dog_lover]

[ She looks directly at the camera, smiling faintly even if it doesn't reach her eyes. Those eyes are... something else, bright gold, with red circles within that almost seem like they swirl as you look at them, drawing you in. ]

Hello. My name is Makima.

I'm here to help.

Anyone who has issues in controlling themselves. Or controlling their temper. Controlling their sadness. Anyone who's afraid of being overwhelmed or hurt, who doesn't know what to do. Anyone who just wants someone to make things simple and peaceful and easy...

We should talk.

[ Makima can be found in all sorts of places. After all, she doesn't need to be in the treehouse to look down at everyone, to watch over everyone. She sometimes is, because it's a nice view, but just as often, she's in the main common room, smiling sweetly and looking out for any trouble. She wanders into the sick ward just as often to see if there's anyone who might want to make a deal with her there, but she doesn't linger.

When she's not 'working', she'll be found in her room, staring (seemingly) at nothing at all. She's still smiling then, always smiling, but there's something missing in her eyes. That's why she makes sure she's behind a door before she does it.

So she doesn't bring down the mood. ]

[ ooc: Makima is the devil of control and can do all sorts of things with people's minds and memories. She'd be more than happy to erase all your sadness so you can be happy enough to leave. How's that for a way out? ]

Comments

[dog_lover]

Then come by my cabin. I'll make the adjustment for you. Just to keep you from murdering anyone.

[pharadyne]

Now? Can't it wait until I'm getting close to murdering someone but haven't yet?

[Because as much as he thinks he might need this, he's scared to do it.]

[dog_lover]

If you don't think you can control yourself, you won't know when you're close. That's why we're doing this.

If you don't want to, you don't have to. But I'm only doing what you agreed with.

[pharadyne]

No, I think I do have to.

[He wrings his hands nervously.]

But I don't want to. But there's all sorts of unpleasant things in life one doesn't want to do but sometimes has to. Cooking. Laundry. Taxes. And maybe having my brain rearranged a little is one of those things.

[dog_lover]

...you're very afraid of things that aren't in your control, aren't you.

Have you considered why?

[pharadyne]

Because I've been controlled by someone who didn't have my best interests at heart and I didn't like it.

[dog_lover]

And you weren't afraid of it before then?

[pharadyne]

I didn't know any better to be afraid of it before then.

[dog_lover]

Didn't you?

Most humans fear being controlled.

Most humans fear that they're being controlled. Or that they will be. Or that something will close off options for them and turn them into rats being led through a path.

Would it help you if we made it a deal?

I can't break the agreement of a deal any more than you could.

[pharadyne]

I was young the first time. Before that, being controlled meant the safety and security of my parents. I didn't always like their control, but I didn't fear it. And couldn't imagine a life or experience that was different until I was living it.

What sort of deal do you propose?

[dog_lover]

If we make a deal, I'm restricted to the terms of the deal. You wouldn't be someone I was using my power on but someone I had a contract with. But you'd have to give me something for the control I'm offering you.

[pharadyne]

So it turns the whole thing into more of a business exchange between equals.

What would you want?

[dog_lover]

A business exchange, yes.

[ She shakes her head. ]

Make an offer.

[pharadyne]

I don't know what I could give you that you might want. It's not as if I'll have a first born child. That's the traditional thing, right?

[dog_lover]

...don't be insulting, please.

What do you have of value? What matters to you?

[pharadyne]

I didn't mean to be insulting. I have no idea how this works.

But for things that matter to me...my looks, I suppose. But I'm not about to trade my looks for murder prevention. I'd rather be beautiful and doomed forever. Priorities.

[dog_lover]

You have nothing but your looks?

You don't have memories you cherish or opportunities you look forward to or a body part you wouldn't mind parting with?

[pharadyne]

I--

[Maybe it's the mention of losing memories that does it, but he suddenly feels very cold.]

I don't think I can go through with this. Is that hypocritical, after I said earlier you should do it to everyone on the barge?

[dog_lover]

Does it matter?

I won't do it if you don't want to. And if the price makes you not want to... better that than buyer's remorse.

It's just an option.

[pharadyne]

I'll continue to consider it. Maybe...eventually...I'll either be ready for it or I'll stop needing it.

[dog_lover]

The goal is the second one, isn't it?

[pharadyne]

Ideally, yes. Because...sometimes I might have to kill. So even if I took you up on your offer, it would be a short-term solution. Keeping the impulse at bay while I work out when it's okay and when it isn't.

[dog_lover]

You think killing is always a viable solution?

That you should always have that available?

[pharadyne]

Available, yes. Because sometimes other people are violent. And the only way to stop them is to be better at it.

[dog_lover]

[ She can't help how her face turns... slightly disgusted. ]

Norton.

That is the single stupidest thing I've ever heard you say.

That's the worst way to do it.